Questions
Hare Krishna please accept my humble obeisances all glories to srila prabhupada. I hope you are doing well and that the weather in Vrndavan is not too difficult for you at the moment. I have deliberated for a few days whether or not to submit to you this question because it really reveals how lost in the mode of ignorance I am. It is a pitiable situation.
Some time ago I put my deities away and am no longer serving them. There is a lot of guilt and shame surrounding the predicament. From what I’ve observed, to be considered a *real* devotee, you have to keep a deity. I have deities of Krishna, baby Krishna and pictures of Nitai/Gaura, Radha/Krishna, and Jagganatha/Baladeva/Subadra that I would serve/ offer prasadam to.
But I was really inconsistent and toward the end doing nothing for the deities at all, not even looking at them. It just felt like nothing I would do was good enough, so I might as well just not have them at all.
For example, if I eat cooked food (prasadam) from the temple, I feel guilty that I had not offered any cooked food to my deities that day. (I never cook except when i have to for a program and when i do its a fiasco.) Now that I don’t have them, I feel that I am relieved from that guilt. Just the commitment of offering fruit prasadam every morning was overwhelming, what to speak of an aarti every evening.
Another example: I make the garlands at the temple once a month and it takes about 12 hours. I use to always feel guilty for not making any garlands for my deities at the end of the service, but Id be too tired. But now I no longer have to feel that guilt.
I also agonized extensively over not putting the deities to rest at night or greeting them in the morning. I don’t know what to say (I don’t even really pray, ever). – It just feels so awkward, I never know how to say or what to say and I end up being flippant or insincere while I seemingly talk at the air.
And then I am suppose to also bathe baby krishna every night with a towel?? It’s as if the daily deity to-do list is unending. It’s so stressful I cant keep up.
It’s been suggested to me to just offer incense or do something simple for them like that every day. But it feels like that is a lie, as if that really isn’t good enough.
What should I do? Should I bring them back out? What is the absolute minimum one should do when keeping deities? Do you have to do the same thing every day? For example, if you offer prasadam, do you have to do that every day? Not having them has felt like such a huge relief every day.
I am asking this question now because a devotee friend of mine recently gifted me a (ceramic) radha krishna deity and it seemed like a shame to mistreat them so I just put them away with everyone else.
Anyway sorry I know this was a painful read. I don’t mind this being read publically if it’s beneficial to others. Maybe abbreviated as I know this was a little (too) long.
thank you
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Answers
Hare Krishna Bhaktin ***
All glories to Srila Prabhupada.
Thanks for asking about my physical health. I am better.
Thank you for asking me Krishna conscious questions.
Let’s start with an analogy. If you drive a car without having gone to driving school, which involves an instructor, books, study, practice, and so on, there’s a good chance you’ll have an accident. The reason is obvious, you didn’t know how to drive.
This largely applies to what is happening to you with the service to your Deities.
First of all, who told you that a *true* devotee must have Deities? And even if so, which Deities? At what point in your spiritual life and what is the necessary standard for someone like you?
If the person who told you this and authorized you to do what you were doing, is a high-level authority (a Guru, a sannyasi, or others of that level), then you should turn to him, because I don’t want to take responsibility for things I didn’t cause.
If, on the other hand, you made those choices based on your devotional feelings, then before doing such important things as serving the Deities, you should consult an authentic spiritual master, and if there are problems, ask him what corrections need to be made.
If you don’t do this, mistakes will be almost inevitable, with all the emotional consequences that they have entailed for you.
There is no single type of *true* devotee, just as there is no single type of sick person. When someone is unwell, they don’t decide on their own what medicine to take, but go to a doctor, who examines them and tells them what they should or shouldn’t do.
In ISKCON there are about 100 initiating Gurus, all of excellent quality. Find the one you “like” the most and follow him. He will tell you which Srimurtis to serve, how, in what way, when and how many times. Material love is given irrationally. Prema, or spiritual love, is not an emotion but something that passes through different stages.
Let’s look at a few other points.
There is no need to offer prasadam at the temple to your Deities, because it has already been offered and accepted, and there is no difference between your Radha Krishna and the one in the temple.
The same principle applies to garlands.
Our prayer is the Hare Krishna mantra and “always remember Krishna and never forget Him,” said Srila Rupa Gosvami.
I prefer not to give you a standard for service to the deities because it depends on many factors, and then if I give it to you, you have to perform it, and if you don’t, you commit offenses.
Bhagavad-gita (4.34): seek a guru, ask him questions, render service to him and take initiation.
tad viddhi praṇipātena
paripraśnena sevayā
upadekṣyanti te jñānaṁ
jñāninas tattva-darśinaḥ
Just try to learn the truth by approaching a spiritual master. Inquire from him submissively and render service unto him. The self-realized souls can impart knowledge unto you because they have seen the truth.
And
atyāhāraḥ prayāsaś ca
prajalpo niyamāgrahaḥ
jana-saṅgaś ca laulyaṁ ca
ṣaḍbhir bhaktir vinaśyati
… One should not act independently or whimsically….
In the ranking of devotional services, the chanting of the Hare Krishna mantra is in first place, and all the others are in the following positions.
Finally, a glass half full of water can be seen as “half full” or “half empty”.
You are not currently performing service to the Srimurtis, but you have done so for a long time.
So, half full.
Therefore, I am pleased with you and I have no doubt that Guru, Krishna, and the Sadhus are happy with you.
YS
Manonatha Dasa (ACBSP)
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