The Light of Day Terrified Her More Than the Dense Darkness of Night

Rādhikā-Krishnacandra, determined fighters in the battle of love, tossed in waves of fear as They cautiously walked along the forest path thinking They may meet Their slanderous elders. In a very solemn mood, They carefully looked here and there with restless side-long glances. No one saw Rādhā-Mādhava walking on the forest path or sneaking into Their homes. Due to the naturally affectionate quality of hlādinī śakti, Rādhā-Mādhava delighted the eyes of the sakhīs. Thus, even the perilous path home, was another pleasure excursion for the Divine Couple[1].

Rādhā-Govinda, frightened by the mention of Jatīlā’s name, ran down separate paths while holding up Their loosened hair, garlands and clothing. In trepidation, the sakhīs also fled in all directions. Krishna imagined that Candrāvalī and her friends were on His left and the elderly cowherds were in front. He feared that the treacherous Jaṭilā was in hot pursuit. Craning His neck in longing, Śyāma looked to His right searching for His anxious lover. Thus Krishna made His way toward the village[2].

One sakhī said to another,

“Look, Krishna returns to His home before the Vrajavāsīs awaken at sunrise. He has thrown away the withered flower garland. Krishna’s jeweled necklace broke during the love battle. His lips have blackened from kissing Rādhā’s kajjala adorned eyes and His body displays His lover ’s fingernail marks. Afraid of being seen, Krishna glances here and there with tired eyes as He runs along the path. See how He stealthily slips into His house![3]

Rādhikā, fearing that Jatīlā was approaching from behind, walked quickly and gracefully towards Vraja even though She was burdened by Her heavy breasts and hips and using Her hands to hold up Her loosened hair and dress[4].

A branchless tree in the distance frightened Rādhā more than seeing a poisonous snake before Her. The cawing of crows scared Rādhā more then the trumpeting of an elephant; the light of day terrified Her more than the dense darkness of night. Today, Rādhā is suffering more from meeting Her lover than from separation[5].

Śrī Rūpa-mañjarī, desiring to bring Rādhā safely home, placed Her in the chariot of her mind and walked behind Her. Due to fear and her affection for Rādhā, Śrī Rūpa covered Rādhā with the protective screen of her ash-grey eyes darting in all directions. Soldiers walk before the king shooting volleys of arrows to ward off approaching enemies. Similarly, Rati-mañjarī, fearing the approach of some unfavorable persons, accompanied Rādhā, shooting the arrows of her restless glances here and there[6].

Rādhā, surrounded by Her sakhīs, entered Her house unseen and lay down in bed. Feeling intense suffering in separation from Krishna, Rādhā started crying. Rādhā, in a voice choked with yearning, opened Her heart to Lalitā[7].

[1] Kṛṣṇāhnika-kaumudi 1.42-43

[2] Govinda- līlāmṛta 1.110-111

[3] Stava-mālā, Kuñja-bhaṅga 2

[4] Govinda-līlāmṛta 1.112

[5] Jagannātha-vallabha-nāṭaka 5.34

[6] Govinda-līlāmṛta 1.113-114

[7] Krishna-bhāvanāmṛtam 2.80


This is a section of the book “Vrindavana Lila”.

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